We bounced our way to Chicago to visit Sarah Gaither, then to St. Louis for the night at my brother’s place, finally making our way to Baton Rouge. After some work there, we continued to New Orleans where things were much much worse. We all were flabbergasted by the unimaginable destruction we witnessed. Perhaps more shocking than the destruction, was driving. For mile after mile after mile it didn’t get better. The vast damage and the number of people affected by it was overwhelming. But we set in to help, one person at a time.
Samaritan’s Purse quickly became an organization we all respected. First, they took care of all our needs: shelter, restrooms, food, supplies, etc. But more importantly, their perspective on the situation was deeply rooted in love for Jesus and sharing that love with others. Work hard—really hard, but if you have opportunity to talk to someone, stop working. And we were required to leave a Bible and pray with everyone we helped. What a joy! Contrary to my fear of encountering victims enraged at and frustrated with God, I never chanced on that attitude. On the contrary, I again and again heard testimonies of how people loved God all the more because they lost everything. If there was any ministering, it was them ministering to me!
Christmas lacked the joy of my brother. He was with my sister’s family in Carolina. Obviously, I was sad, yet it by no means ruined Christmas. We still had an enormous celebration with all the relatives and friends proving to be almost as joyous. After Christmas, my immediate family (that being my pop, mom, and myself) traveled to Canada for our annual ski trip. There wasn’t as much snow as we hoped for, but we made the best of it.
Since I didn’t get to share the holidays with my brother, we made up for it by spending a weekend in Colorado skiing at Breckinridge and Vail. The first day was the coldest day of skiing I have ever encountered—with the wind chill taken into account, the temp dropped to -30. The frigid temperature gave us frost nip on our faces by the end of most runs and to this day (a month and a half later), the end of my nose is still a bit red and numb! Our lodging was the most luxurious mountain condo I have ever seen, and what made it all the better is that it is owned by one of our friends. It sat on the edge of a mountain opposite Breck, overlooking the slopes and the town. It was by no means small to say the least. Each of the four stories had 25 ft ceilings, a big screen TV with surround sound, an amazing view…and as you may be gathering, it could sleep 14 in beds! Posh…
I now live in Spokane with my dear friend Erik—a man blatantly called to be a medical missionary to China. He has a heart for the nations and for prayer. We have far too much fun together as we frequently laugh ourselves to tears. We spend a great deal of time together and, in all honesty, it feels as though we are married as we work our way through a deep friendship with all the joys and struggles inherent within purposeful and intimate relationships. Through these past 4 months of living together, we have challenged and encouraged each other in BIG ways.
Most notable of all is the dramatic change in my life caused by Uganda and illness. For about 4 years now, the HS reserved a fond portion of my heart for Uganda. “Why” perplexed me while knowing full well how someday this fondness would prove relevant by His providence. January was providence. The Lord laid a deep burden on my heart for Uganda through and variety of means, which daily affirmed supernatural directing. One of these means was a film called Invisible Children documenting the atrocities of Northern Uganda where a rebel group called the Lord’s Resistance Army is abducting thousands of children, torturing and brainwashing them, and forcing the boys to fight as soldiers and the girls to serve as sexual slaves. The children in Northern Uganda fear for their lives fleeing nightly to cities, sleeping in bus parks, under cars, and under the verandas. So far, over 30,000 children have been abducted and many have died. This has been going on for 20 years and the UN is calling it the “largest neglected humanitarian emergency” in the world. (www.InvisibleChildren.com)While attending a missions conference in Portland, I had the opportunity to talk to some staff from Invisible Children and quickly became a volunteer in the Spokane booking screenings in the area colleges and high schools. It keeps me busy constantly trying to book screenings at Universities, churches, and high schools, but I am starting to see the fruit of this.
By this time, you are probably curious about my two mentions of “illness.” While the whole Uganda revelation was going on, the Lord surprised me yet again. In January, I rather flippantly underwent some medical testing prescribed by my Doctor (i.e. Dr. Dad). They are standard test he performs on virtually all his patients, but since I’m technically not a patient of my dad’s, I never did these tests. We both expected to find nothing, except maybe some parasites or something… :-) However, we were both stunned by the results. A couple findings came back abnormal: along with discovering a modest Candida yeast infection, pancreatic enzyme insufficiency, and low intestinal antibodies, it most dramatically disclosed a strongly elevated large intestine inflammatory marker. Normal range for this marker is about 60. High inflammation would be 160. I resulted with 1100+ (that's not a typo). So what's that mean? Basically my colon was very swollen and thus not able to function as it ought. Although there were no chronic side effects, it could be an early marker for something far worse. I prayed this wasn't the case. For the past three months, I have been on a highly strict diet (if you thought I had it tough eating last year, it is much harder now...) and taking many digestive enzymes and probiotics to help develop healthy bacteria in my gut and heal the GI lining so that it will not develop into a chronic disease. Here is what I wrote shortly after receiving word in January:
“Over the past couple months, I have felt a heightened amount of spiritual warfare around me. It has been difficult and burdensome. But I do not say this tritely: the Lord is faithful. Although the world may consider this struggle to be bad, the Lord is using it for good. This is not to say that it has been a happy, easy-going time. No, it's been difficult. I know I am weak. I know I am sick. It is fearful and worrisome. But truly truly truly, my weakness has made the Lord strong. And there is some explainable joy that is in me---some hope. (Rom 5--struggle produces endurance, to character, to hope b/c God's love has been poured into our hearts). I'll be honest, I could eventually die from this. It's not probable, but possible. I think the Lord still wants me to be here for a while longer so I'm content. Either way, I don't really mind too much because if my God is powerful and kind enough to knit me together in my mother's womb, and He already proved he can raise people from the dead so no worries there, then most assuredly, He can easily grow me some new bowels or even fix the ones I've got! More importantly than this physical home though, my soul is being nourished daily. Yahweh, my Father, is proving His name to me (Ex 34:6). It is good. I still need your prayers. Pray for healing, both spiritual and physical. Pray for continued and deepening dependence on our Lord. Thank you. A month ago I memorized a verse from Corinthians; I now cling to it daily. So I do not lose heart. Although this outer nature is wasting away, my inner nature is being renewed day by day. For this slight momentary affliction is preparing me for a weight of glory beyond all comparison as I look not to the things that are seen, but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.”
And what came of it? Where do I stand now? Closer to the Lord, relying more on His faithfulness and who He inherently is, and becoming more firmly established as a follower of Jesus through the power of the Holy Spirit. I recently penned this to Ben:
“My prayer when I moved to Spokane was to know God more through this season of life and He is answering in ways I never expected, but ways far better than I imagined. Ben, this illness has been one of the best things that has happened to me. Satan intended it for evil but God is using it for good! Because of it, I know God more. I know who He is, and His character He is proving to me—or maybe I believe in who He is more. I trust God more than I ever have. The other day I was talking to Jerry and realized how I, in all consideration, have stepped out of this body and see it only as a momentary home. Ben, I’m intended for a new body to praise the Lord without this weight of sin corroding my flesh. For the first time in my life, I can say with all my heart, to live is Christ and to die is gain. My body is falling apart and if I die I get to go to Heaven to be with Jesus. But despite this body that is approaching death because it is so marred by sin, I know that although death and sin should cause me worry, it doesn’t. I have been set free from sin and death, and I live a new life—the law of the spirit of life in Christ Jesus. The only way I will live is if God heals me, and so I know to live is for Christ. That’s why I’m here! For Christ—for nothing or no one else! I was not made to enjoy this world for myself. I was not made to be successful. I was not made for some woman. None of these are my purpose for being here. My purpose is Christ. Period. End of story.”
I waited on the Lord and He heard my cry. I recently received the results from my retesting and that high result of 1100+ is now 24! Praise the Lord from Whom all blessing flow!
I still wait on the Lord. He is doing good things in my life, yet I still rob my soul from adequate time in His Word. I am starving myself and know it! I am so thankful for the prayers of so many people who are lifting me up. God hears and answers. A huge prayer of mine is for God to open my mouth. It may bit a weird concept, but I feel like there is some sinful force eagerly attempting to clamp my lips closed and it often works. But I cannot see what is causing this. I just know the HS has power to not only open my mouth but to also empower me with words to say and embolden me to say them with confidence! Another letter to a friend on the topic:
(Speaking about Invisible Children) “In a way, I feel like John the Baptist preparing the way for these people! And then I think to myself, “how is it that I can put so much effort into sharing this story of such tragedy when I know a greater story of such Hope??” It is a perturbing question.... The Lord is using this opportunity to mold me and make me bold—I mean, I can talk to anyone about this story and I do! I’ve been praying for a while now for the Lord to “open my mouth”—that is, to free it to speak openly and lovingly whenever I should. And the crazy thing is that He’s doing it!!! Funny eh? I talked to a guy named Paul the other day on the ski slopes and invited him to church (this might not sound like a huge thing, but it is. You see, it wasn’t forced it just came naturally and freely). Yesterday I struck up a conversation with a man and quickly discovered that he was a Christian. I later found out he was a missionary in Scandinavia and Czechoslovakia doing tons of evangelism. I took note asking him a bunch of questions; his “methodology” for evangelism was the best response I’ve heard: “pray a lot. Even fast. And then listen to the Holy Spirit’s leading.” It was encouraging to hear him speak and tell stories. God has amazing ways of placing people in our lives to encourage.”
So what keeps me busy? I am generously involved with my church in regards to music. The church is becoming a family to me. This is good. People are thankful for my service. You know, it is good to be needed and used, especially as it relates to my gifts.
As far as work, I am working for Bill. He has a website (www.BiblicalTraining.org) offering a free seminary education. Essentially, he records the lectures from a theological scholars on a given topic, and then posts the audio files as well as the class notes online. In the end, you have a vast array of courses offered from some of the top scholars of the nation, absolutely free! My role in this is to edit some of the audio and to create course outlines—basically, I get paid to listen to amazing teachers give their lectures! (And to think—I used to pay big bucks to do the same thing!). I don’t make much, but it pays the bills.
Very soon I will be heading back up to Alaska to work for the White Pass and Yukon Route Railway. Come visit me! So I think that’s about it. Consider yourself updated as to the life of Paul.
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